Last Resort

Sep 30

Papa Roach some of your interviews talk about wanting your fans to "feel" the emotions of your music - did it ever occur to you that a person might take the lyrics from one of your songs to heart?

Well hats off to "Papa Roach" and your big hit "Last Resort" - my 29 year old son Jeffrey, played Last Resort over and over and over and over, the week before he killed himself on a lethal dose of Oxycontin!

Your words inspire no one, about anything, but despair and doom...

Replies to This Posting

  1. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I'm sorry about your son, I really am

    but to say "Your words inspire no one, about anything, but despair and doom..." is stupid, completely wrong and a downright lie.

    I understand that you are hurt, but you cannot blame his suicide on listening to a song.

    I can say for myself that there are a lot of papa roach songs that give me strength, there are a lot of songlines that keep me going.

  2. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I agree with ReckLezz.

    Truly sorry to hear your son.

    But songs lyrics have different meanings to different people and people have different ways of viewing how they relate the song/lyrics.

    Papa Roach songs have helped me through some tough times and for that i am forever grateful to them.

    You honestly cannot blame Papa Roach for this tragedy although i can understand why you feel you should but as i said above different meanings to different people.

  3. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I too am sorry for your sons death, but what you are saying is wrong.

    It is human nature to look for someone to blame, but the fact is your son killed himself.

    Papa Roach are no more responsible for his death than Grand Theft Auto is responsible for criminal teens. Your son was 29, a fully grown adult and capable of making his own decisions without some rock band telling him to do so.

    Millions of people listen to that song and don't kill themselves. Your son was obviously in a dark place and saw no way out, which is sad, but I would say that song more than likely brought him some comfort in his final days, otherwise he wouldn't have listened to it. If that song hadn't existed, he would have found some other song to reflect his mood and still killed himself. Maybe if he had got some help, or the right kind of help, he would still be with you.

    And before you say anything, I do know what I am talking about, as I am a former mental health patient myself, and I am still involved with people who think about suicide, but I hope I am doing my part, along with the proper services to bring them out of it over time.

    Again I am sorry for your loss, but I take offence to people blaming forms of media (rap/rock/games) for individual tragedies. It is these kinds of claims that get the news media talking and start pushing towards censorship. Millions, nay billions of us, enjoy these things and live normal lives, and we also have the sense to protect the vulnerable (eg kids) from unsuitable media.

    It's about time people, parents, governments etc looked at themselves and started regulating who is getting hold of things they shouldn't, rather than blaming the subject matter itself.

  4. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    Thank you for your responses. I'm not surprised that you all disagree with me. But, let me ask you this - have any of you ever heard the phase "Act as if, until you become"?

    It's a concept based on the "power of words" and if you hear, say, repeat and/or write a thought enought times - it becomes real.

    So, go ahead and justify your choice in music, and when your banging your brains out with it - what is Papa Roach's music motivating your soul to do? Is it something positive, or negative?

    Chow

  5. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    i'm really sorry for your loss too but i have to agree with the others...
    i do know how you feel cause this summer a very close friend of mine killed himself... who stays has to go on with a heavy heart cause you feel angry, useless and lonely... during those tough days the only thing that helped me move on was family and music, music is always a painkiller to me..
    i repeat, i understand perfectly how you feel, and i also know how does it feel to see someone you love fall apart, sometimes there's just nothing we can do to help them out unfortunately... but you just can't blame papa roach, i think i've realized that when something like this happens there's simply no one to blame.. sometimes pain is just too unbearable...

  6. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    Like i said and B-Ri, you son must have been in a sad place for him to want to take his own life. When i listen to LAST RESORT and i have done for many years, no suicidal thoughts cross my mind at all.

    I think that is because i must hear the lyrics differently to what you son did (if that makes sense).

    I feel that whatever crosses your mind when you listen to a song depends on what mood your in and what state of mind your in. On a Bad day a certain song can bring you to tears, on a Good day the same song can bring a smile onto your face.

    Again i would like to send my condolenses to you and your family through this heart breaking time.

  7. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    Papa Roach's music doesn't motivate me to do anything. I motivate myself like everyone else does.

    At first I tried to be reasonable with you, but clearly your ignorance is impenetrable.

    Only one person is ever responsible for someone's actions. That is yourself.

    Let me ask you this. If he hadn't been listening to Last Resort, do you honestly think he wouldn't have killed himself?

  8. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    P.S:

    If it helps, I can list a load of other songs which deal with suicide for you, and also tell you I have listened to last resort a few times a week since 1999, and in that time been jobless, homesless and lost my gf all at the same time.

    And I'm still here.

  9. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    jeffreyjam79mom wrote:

    So, go ahead and justify your choice in music, and when your banging your brains out with it - what is Papa Roach's music motivating your soul to do? Is it something positive, or negative?


    something positive - examples:

    "I wanna be free from this ball and chain
    I wanna be free from this life of pain"
    - makes me clear I gotta do something to get out of my life if I wanna end my misery

    "Gotta follow my heart no matter how far"
    - my problem is that I don't listen to my heart because my dreams seem impossible to achieve

    well I don't think any one of us needs to justify ourselves, or why we like papa roach or why we are fans, or why we say the music inspires us

    if you just came to argue with other people about how bad papa roach lyrics are in your eyes, then I'm sorry to say but you might have signed up on the wrong site

  10. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    There are five stages of grief you go through after losing a loved one. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance. Clearly you're in the anger stage right now and you feel like you need to release your anger on the blame, but your blaming the worse source. To be well again you need to go through all five stages and I hope someday you move out of the anger stage and reach acceptance.

  11. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I remember when my Uncle committed suicide; I felt so angry, not only with him, what must have been happening, but with the fact that I was completly blind to it all. Today, yesterday and tomorrow, I will always feel upset about this. At first, I blamed others and tried to ignore the truth. Now though, I realise , even in his depression, he ws in control.

    I'm very sorry for your loss. It really is a terrible time. But I'm afraid I wouldn't lay the burden on Papa Roach.

  12. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    B-Ri wrote:
    I too am sorry for your sons death, but what you are saying is wrong.

    It is human nature to look for someone to blame, but the fact is your son killed himself.

    Papa Roach are no more responsible for his death than Grand Theft Auto is responsible for criminal teens. Your son was 29, a fully grown adult and capable of making his own decisions without some rock band telling him to do so.

    Millions of people listen to that song and don't kill themselves. Your son was obviously in a dark place and saw no way out, which is sad, but I would say that song more than likely brought him some comfort in his final days, otherwise he wouldn't have listened to it. If that song hadn't existed, he would have found some other song to reflect his mood and still killed himself. Maybe if he had got some help, or the right kind of help, he would still be with you.

    And before you say anything, I do know what I am talking about, as I am a former mental health patient myself, and I am still involved with people who think about suicide, but I hope I am doing my part, along with the proper services to bring them out of it over time.

    Again I am sorry for your loss, but I take offence to people blaming forms of media (rap/rock/games) for individual tragedies. It is these kinds of claims that get the news media talking and start pushing towards censorship. Millions, nay billions of us, enjoy these things and live normal lives, and we also have the sense to protect the vulnerable (eg kids) from unsuitable media.

    It's about time people, parents, governments etc looked at themselves and started regulating who is getting hold of things they shouldn't, rather than blaming the subject matter itself.


    Your statement was to the point! i'm really proud of you!

  13. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    Hello!! I'm very sorry to hear about your son!! the pain of you must feel! was he your only son ?? and the pic that is posted is that him ? i have an 18 year son and he is my life! with out him i'm not sure what would become of me!
    Trying to help someone deal with a death is awkward and difficult and suicide is a million times worse. People who have lost a loved one not due to death itself, but something as painful and awful as suicide, don't just have grief weighing on their shoulders - they are experiencing anger, guilt, confusion, shock, horror and trauma that goes beyond the "normal" after emotions of a death. They may not have known that their loved one was unhappy; they may be angry for being left behind; they may feel guilty and hate themselves for not being able to prevent it. The victims of suicide are not just limited to the person who committed it - suicide leaves a life long mark on all those around it. Every person's emotions and reactions are different, which is exactly what makes it so hard to comfort them. Did your son give any warning sighs ? With suicide there is always some kind of warning sighs! Its very easy to lay the blame on someone else. In this case you are blameing Papa Raoch! all do respect to you but have you heard any other songs from Papa Roach?? these guys are awesome! they write lyrics that are their life experience! the songs that hey have written has helped so many people! Last Resort was a life changing experience for the band! again i'm very sorry for your lost! but you have to ask yourself! how did my son get to that point!! it wasn't because of a song, but maybe something in his life that he thougth he couldn't handle! Again i can't not exprss enough how sorry i am about your son's death! And i will pray for you and your family!

  14. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    camaro wrote:
    B-Ri wrote:
    I too am sorry for your sons death, but what you are saying is wrong.

    It is human nature to look for someone to blame, but the fact is your son killed himself.

    Papa Roach are no more responsible for his death than Grand Theft Auto is responsible for criminal teens. Your son was 29, a fully grown adult and capable of making his own decisions without some rock band telling him to do so.

    Millions of people listen to that song and don't kill themselves. Your son was obviously in a dark place and saw no way out, which is sad, but I would say that song more than likely brought him some comfort in his final days, otherwise he wouldn't have listened to it. If that song hadn't existed, he would have found some other song to reflect his mood and still killed himself. Maybe if he had got some help, or the right kind of help, he would still be with you.

    And before you say anything, I do know what I am talking about, as I am a former mental health patient myself, and I am still involved with people who think about suicide, but I hope I am doing my part, along with the proper services to bring them out of it over time.

    Again I am sorry for your loss, but I take offence to people blaming forms of media (rap/rock/games) for individual tragedies. It is these kinds of claims that get the news media talking and start pushing towards censorship. Millions, nay billions of us, enjoy these things and live normal lives, and we also have the sense to protect the vulnerable (eg kids) from unsuitable media.

    It's about time people, parents, governments etc looked at themselves and started regulating who is getting hold of things they shouldn't, rather than blaming the subject matter itself.


    Your statement was to the point! i'm really proud of you!


    yes i'm proud of you too...your words are deep and meaningful!

    i'm sorry to hear about ur son.....but i agree with everybody else!

    Jacoby the lyrical god of all papa roach songs.....has gone threw some crazy shit in his life.....and he lays it out in his lyrics...it's his way of relieveing his pain i believe.......in my eyes the lyrics motivate you to be a stronger person...i might look at this differently but thats what i believe.

    don't put the blame on papa roach music....they don't deserve that...their music has helped SOOO many people just on this site alone...in becoming a stronger person.

    i'm sorry to say but ur son made the decision he had to make....it was nobody elses decision but his own.........

  15. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    jeffreyjam79mom wrote:
    Thank you for your responses. I'm not surprised that you all disagree with me. But, let me ask you this - have any of you ever heard the phase "Act as if, until you become"?

    It's a concept based on the "power of words" and if you hear, say, repeat and/or write a thought enought times - it becomes real.

    So, go ahead and justify your choice in music, and when your banging your brains out with it - what is Papa Roach's music motivating your soul to do? Is it something positive, or negative?

    Chow



    Hi jeffreyjam79mom

    I am sorry to hear about your loss and circumstances surrounding your son's death. Suicide is such a waste of good life, but he must of had his reasons, which obviously without me knowing you or him I do not need to or have the right to know.

    Regarding your post, I do believe that music/video games/films etc cannot be blamed for the things happening in society. If people are, and I'm I'll apologise in advance if you take this the wrong way, weak minded enough to take things as gospel and act upon something because they are negatively motivated/inspired by the form of media, than they shouldn't be listening to it in the first place,

    I am a massive Papa Roach fan indeed, and I'm not typing this to defend them but they cannot be blamed for this or even partially blamed.

    If you listen to the lyrics of the song, it doesn't inspire suicide and that would be down to interpretation of the individual. If anything this song only serves to describe the feelings of a man on the edge and his feelings regarding his life. Yes, i understand, the "would it be wrong, would it be right, if I took my life tonight , chance are that i might, mutualation out of sight, and I'm contemplating suicide" can be completely taken the wrong way if you do not understand the stories behind the lyrics. Just because the song says this, doesn't make me or millions of others out there actually contemplate suicide and again that would be down to the personal interpretation of the individual listening.

    I am really sorry to hear about your loss but PR do not inspire despair and doom. Your son must have already been in a very dark dark place mentally and had circumstances which made him do what he did. To say the band and their song are responsible for motivating his actions is plain wrong.

    I hated how the media latched onto blaming Columbine on Marilyn Manson and this IMO is a similar reaction. For everyone million people who hear these songs and don't do anything bad, there will always be 1 or 2 who interpret the song/film/game wrongly and do something stupid that seems rational to them.

    I am not meaning to sound like I am being overly aggressive in defence here, but i feel passionatly about this in terms of people using bands/games/films as scapegoats or counting them responsible for things that they have had no control over.

    I hope you find peace one day, I cannot imagine what it is like to lose a son as I am only 21 myself and I hope I never experience what you have had to endure, I hope your son is at peace now.

    Rob

  16. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    Just to add to the thread further.

    I have been thinking about what you said regarding, does the band motivate something positive and negative in me.

    Well I'd say something positive tbh, songs like M-80 (Explosive Energy Movement) with the lyrics "I'm strong and fearless, just because I've got rock n roll" are uplifting to me. I listened to this great band during my university final year consistantly, during working on my 8000 page dissertation and they kept my mind occupied and kept me happy and in the end, through having my mind occupied and listening to some heavy tracks, I ended up graduating and am now training to be a teacher.

    Songs like "Carry Me" and "Into The Light" are inspirational when the back is against the wall, with lyrics like "I've taken a beating, but I won't back down".

    Anyway I have gotten away from the topic a bit there. You mentioned that quote which I have lost, along the lines of the more I hear, the more I do e.g. I hear something enough that I act upon it. Well I am sorry but that is down to weak mindedness that something like that is so impressionable to not be able to see the difference between a story/song and reality. I know you could come back and say the opposite especially after I said how I was positvely motivated by the band and as such that would make me weak minded, but I have been motivated to do things not even related to the music and as such the motivation has actually come from within myself and the tracks have I suppose just been coincidence.

    I hope you do not take this wrong way, as I do not want to upset you or anyone else!!!

  17. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I'm so sorry to hear about your son. He looks like a handsome boy and I cant even imagine how you are feeling right now.

    Although most people on here will disagree with your opinion I hope that by venting your anger it has helped you in a little bit to feel more at peace.

    You are in my thoughts thought I'd leave you a wee poem someone gave me when my dad died...I found it really comforting.

    You cannot see or touch me but I'm standing next to you
    Your tears can only hurt me, your sadness makes me blue
    Be brave & show a smiling face let not your grief show through
    I love you from a different place but I'm standing next to you

    Take Care
    x

  18. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    i'm sorry about your son.
    but i've been in that place where you don't wanna live anymore and when you really reach that point no song or person can drive you over the edge. and i don't know why your son played that song over and over again. but i know why i did. it made me feel less alone
    that song is still really important to me because it says exactly how i felt in my darkest days.
    once again i'm sorry about your son

  19. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I too am very sorry to hear of your loss.
    Suicide, and the depression and the threats that often go with it are devestating to a family. I cannot pretend that I can comprehend your pain. My son is about your son's age, so I can only imagine the pain you have experienced.
    I can only offer my support to you. My mother suffered from mental illness my entire life, and those who have not experienced the helplessness (and misplaced guilt) you feel, cannot even begin to comprehend the misery of that rollercoaster-ride from hell. You never know when the slightest imagined slight might lead down a destructive path. The suicide threats and failed attempts my family had to endure from my mother when I was young were Hell on earth, no other way to put it. You try to love them "enough", but no matter what you do, or how hard you try, you are fighting an enemy that you can't see, and you cannot reason with. HELPLESSNESS is all I remember from that period of my life. I am so sorry you had to endure this.
    Yes, "Last Resort" is a tough song to take. That said, I have to confess that one of the reasons I love Papa Roach is that overall, their songs are about triumphing over the kind of pain your son was dealing with. "Change or Die" and "Alive and Out of Control" are a couple of my favorites. To me, even "Last Resort" is a positive song. Knowing that I'm not alone in pain helps me put my fist in the air and fight another day. Sometimes, hearing "I can't go on living this way" motivates me to get off my backside and change the things in my life that suffocate me.
    Don't blame yourself, don't blame the band, BLAME THE DISEASE. Fighting depression is a war, a war that not everyone can win.

  20. RE: Last Resort

    Sep 30

    I too am deeply sorry for your loss, I cannot begin to imagine the pain that you are feeling. I truly hope that you find closure.. But I do agree with the others, music cannot be blamed for this. People still make their own decisions, Im sorry that your sons was that one..

    You asked how does Papa Roach influence us pos or neg.. Papa Roach has never done anything but save my life, I too has suffered for depression and music and especially Papa Roach is truly my saving grace....and I am sure many others do feel the same about them..

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers

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