Listen up you bloody wankers, i would like to tell you a story about Bob the pig.

Bob the pig was a happy little pig who ate and slept all day long 24/7 over the years he got fatter and fatter and fatter so fat the farmer had to build a new barn big enough just for bob now bob was depressed because when the farmer came to feed him he ate the farmers wife mistaking her as a apple so farmer beat him with a pretzel as bob as the pretzel he sucked up the farmer bob enjoyed the taste of the farmer and his apple wife that he broke down the barn and went nuts running to D.C. eating all the people in his way then the Government came down and tazed him in the butt making him smell like bacon so they made a giant tazer and tazed bob to death and then ate him and sold his baconess to local markers and that is how we got bacon...the end