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It must've been about 5 years now, maybe 6. To be honest, I lose count, but let's just say that it's been a LONG time since my first relationship ended. It was pretty long distance, and shit has changed a lot since then (for example: she's with another woman now). We've had a few up and down moments of contact, but we still talk on occasions. She lives on the other side of the country. Hell, I could list 1000 things that show how daft this is gonna sound.

Why is it, that after all this time, distance, change, etc, that I still love her?

1 dream. 1 tiny, insignificant dream and once again I return to the state of 'oh god, if only things were different, I would be so damn happy right now'. I hate this. I like not being a soppy git, but I can't avoid it, it's annoying.

I fucking miss you, and miss the feeling that someone loves me as much as you did.

Ugh.